The internet is flooded with endless content on ‘Acceptance’. However, if it was so easy to comprehend it, each of us would have evolved into a Buddha by now.
One can perceive ‘Acceptance’ as resignation or escapism. At least in India, we have perceived it to be so, on a large scale. If you see garbage on the road, it is apparently because authorities have accepted and resigned that it can never be cleaned. Hence, as citizens, we also accept this fact and do not put any efforts towards cleaning it or asking the authorities to take action.
However, that is not the case only within India. All over the world, when it comes to us as individuals, don’t we all perceive ‘Acceptance’ as resignation or defeat? If we are unable to wake up on time and exercise, we resign ourselves to accepting ‘I can’t do this.’
This attribute of ‘I can’t do this’ can spread widely from our daily habits to intricate strategic decision making in boardrooms and mega organizations. The moment we accept the attribute of ‘I can’t do this,’ resignation kicks in and the whole engine of failure propels. On one hand, we start failing when we stop trying. However, this failure snowballs when we become obsessed with making that thing happen. No matter how we approach it, failure starts to permeate in either way.
In the pretext of Acceptance we start looking at things as challenges and become obsessed with resolving them. Obsession drives us in a completely different direction.
For instance, spiritual obsession can become a very big reason for complacency. The quest to know ‘Who I am’ needs to be approached in a unique way rather than obsessing over it. The obsession begins when we accept the spiritual quest as a challenge. From somewhere this perception creeps in that we want to know ‘Who I am.’ And, to determine ‘Who I Am,’ we need to sit up for hours trying to focus on this one question. We do not realize when this quest transforms into an obsession.
Acceptance is neither resignation nor is it a call for a challenge. It is a state of complete awareness and consciousness. In order to attain Acceptance, we need to develop a ‘Sthir Buddhi,’ or Stable Intellect for the lack of a better word.
A ‘Sthir Buddhi’ cannot be developed by forced practices of focus. We need to become both the ‘Object’ and the ‘Subject’ ourselves. We need to develop the ability as well as the courage to observe the ‘object’ that is ‘self’ by becoming the ‘subject’ which is also ‘self.’
When we ‘Accept’ something or someone entirely, it is the state of absolute love. For instance, a loving and devoted parent who accepts a child will not get angry if the child smothers himself/herself in dirt or mud. The parent will be able to resonate with the joy which the child is experiencing. Consequently, they will keep everything aside and clean up the child with the utmost love and care. Along with that, they will educate the child for the future, share ideas, and facts about how playing in the mud can be transformed into a game and enjoyed by both the parent and the child.
‘Self Acceptance’ is also a state of absolute love. We do not need to exercise or eat well because we hate being fat, instead, we must do it because we love ourselves. And, when we love someone, we do things that are progressive and caring. However, how tough is to ‘love’ something which is ‘fat’?
That brings us back to the need of developing a ‘Sthir buddhi.’ The moment we see something lacking, the only sentiment we produce is ‘dislike.’ When dislike creeps in, ‘Sthir Buddhi,’ jumps out of the window.
We are functioned to segregate things into ‘likes’ and ‘dislikes’ automatically. Developing ‘Sthir Buddhi’ is being in a state of total acceptance. We get rid of our ‘likes’ and ‘dislikes’ and start looking at things just the way they are.
Not operating from ‘Sthir Buddhi’ leads to different impacts on our #MentalHealth. Constant resignation gives rise to a consistent feeling of failure that ultimately leads to ‘depression’ and a deep state of sadness. On the other hand, trying to change everything because we consider it a challenge, develops ‘Obsessive Compulsive Disorder’ making things worse for our #MentalHealth situations.
As human beings, we are blessed with amazing facilities of analytical abilities, objectivity, and great intellect. However, very few of us can use these tools properly due to the compulsions of tagging things under our likes or dislikes. The need to develop Acceptance with a Sthir Buddhi is ever increasing.
May we all become Sthir Pragya.